Empathy, love, humanity, and sisterhood.
“He is like an orchid, he is like a bird of paradise, oh, he is so handsome.”
In this courtship performance, men and women sit across from one another, singing sonnets and love songs with the intention of finding a partnership. Since this was a performance, there were no men sitting among us. But still they sang.
This old method of courtship is very different from how men and women come together nowadays at the "disco."
My mom and I walked over to these singing women at first to listen and take some photos. After no more than a minute, a woman grabbed my arm and sat me down on the muddied ground. She smiled and reached for my hand, a gesture of inclusivity. She introduced the performance, one that symbolizes love. Between clay-covered bodies and grass skirts (a traditional daily bila, one not worn daily anymore), my mother and I sat, and the women sang. Arms up, arms down, head shaking left to right in a rhythmic trance. Cassowary feathers tickled my cheeks as they swayed their heads.
A break in song presented itself, and I began to tell the women that I had found a man back home that I wanted to marry.
"AWOOOOOOOO"
They all hooted in unison.
The woman to my left undid her cassowary headband adorned with kina shells and tied it around my forehead. They told me they had a song for me. First, they sang in their native tongue (almost every village & clan has its own separate language or pidgin dialect), then they translated.
“He is like an orchid, he is like a bird of paradise, oh, he is so handsome.”
An age-old song presented and gifted to someone far from their own. It reminded me of the silly, overused phrase "love is universal." More so, sisterhood is universal. Everywhere I have ever traveled, there is an unspeakable understanding and a web of connection, woman to woman. Despite vastly different human experiences, we can come together with the familiarity of womanhood in our own unique ways.
I was so overwhelmed with their kindness and joy to share. Tears streamed down my cheeks, and I couldn't stop smiling. One by one, as I looked around the circle, they began to tear up. Womanhood says a million things with just a small action. In this small circle surrounded by these incredible women, we could feel together. Here, there was no language barrier, no judgment, just love.
Empathy. Sisterhood. Love. Humanity.
Not long after, the string band began to play, and we all got up with our muddied bums and shimmied our hips side to side, our arms left to right, our feet shuffling north to south, east to west.
-Z
0 comments